Starting to lose hope about ssi going up :(

I already know it probably isn’t going to go up on this next check

I’m applying for rent assistance but have no idea if I’ll get accepted 

There’s an investigation going on my ssi

I just feel like it’s not going to go up before it’s too late

If it ever does go up

My mom hates when I talk like that. She thinks I need to be positive 

Everyone I talk to thinks it’s going to work out

Mhmr was supposed to help me with rent last month, $100

But my landlord said he never got it

So I already owe him $100

I owe the person I borrowed $400 to pay for this month

We’re going to mhmr on Friday to see if they are going to pay that $100 because they told me they did but my landlord said they didn’t

Then also trying to apply for rent assistance on Friday

I feel so broke because I can only pay $200 a month for my $600 rent

And if I get kicked out of my apartment I’ll be forced off probation and I’ll go to prison

It’s like it is all designed to send me to prison

I’m going to beg the rent assistance people but he sounded pretty sure he could help

I worry about that $100 I owe the landlord if mhmr is actually going to pay it

I worry about my ssi not going up in time or at all

I worry about the money I borrowed

I worry if it doesn’t work out I’m going to be forced off probation and go to prison

The only good news I have is food stamps is only 2 days away

I’ll get $300 to buy tons of food

That’s going to make me happy and have more energy for sure

Probation fees may get reduced or ended completely soon

That would be very nice

I won’t find out for a few weeks maybe months

But could save me hundreds 

Snap in 2 days is so exciting I’m going to have so much food

Everyone can tell I’m super depressed about possibly going to prison because I get kicked out of my apartment because ssi doesn’t go up if I don’t get rent assistance 

I’m just like.. what if ssi doesn’t go up

It should I’m not working

But I wouldn’t be surprised if something goes wrong and it doesn’t go up

My mom says I could always get a job but idk if I get a job ssi will be all messed up again and I’ll be working for nothing

I just can’t believe it’s already been 3 months and it could take 2 entire more months to hear from them

I’m so stressed 

Just completely over stressing about the situation but it is super serious 

Best case scenario ssi goes up for may to 890

Probation fees get waived 

I get rent assistance for this coming up month

Mhmr pays that $100 they said they would

And I pay off most of my loan

Then at 890 a month I can finally start living a healthy life

Not a poor unhealthy life

I can’t believe I could possibly have to go 2 more months like this